Gay and Out in the Promised Land
by Adrian W. Lilly
Dressed in trendy yet casual layers befitting the mild day, the handsome Israeli singer Ivri Lider was a bit breathless as he entered the restaurant. But that was to be expected. He was in the midst of a whirlwind American tour that included speaking at an HRC breakfast in Washington, DC, receiving the key to the City of West Hollywood, and concerts in cities on both coasts and Chicago. Since coming out in 2002, Lider has maintained superstar status in his native Israel. He sat down with the Bay Area Reporter to discuss being out as a gay man in Israel.
Adrian W. Lilly: You have a song in English, "Jesse," on an upcoming American compilation. What’s it about?
Ivri Lider:It’s about a love for a guy who will go to bed with you, but will not talk to you, because he does not see himself as gay. I think we all know them, And you believe that if you just do your thing, then you will be able to show him who he really is.
Any thoughts of translating your songs?
I’m sure there are some songs that can be translated and be really interesting, because the sound is a little different, and that’s good, I think. But I can’t do it. I can write new songs in English, but I cannot translate my own songs from Hebrew. Maybe because I sang them so many times in Hebrew, and I know the meanings, and sometimes when you translate, you have to change the meaning a little bit to fit the rhyming and song structure.
When you released The New People in 2002, you came out publicly. What gave you the courage?
When I wrote the record, the songs were all very clear and very real and about my life. And I felt it would be ridiculous, having to meet a journalist and talk around something, or not say something or not answer direct questions.
How long have you known you’re gay?
I think I knew I was gay when I was 10, and my first gay experience was when I was 24. So it took me a lot of years to act on that. So actually, my first album was before, and it’s full of this mixed-up person who doesn’t really know who he is or what he wants. Then I started living my true self. I was never in the closet in my family. I was very lucky with my family. I think my mother is really happy about it. She is. She even says that sometimes. It gives me a lot of strength.
How did you come out to your mother?
One night - I was living with her at the time - I didn’t come home. And she said, "Well, where were you?" And I said, "I met someone." And she said, "A boy or a girl?" I said, "It’s a boy," and she said "OK, cool," and that was it. That’s my coming out story.
What’s it like to be gay in Israel?
It’s totally safe. I’m gay, everybody knows I’m gay. It’s all over the papers all the time, and I perform everywhere, not just Tel Aviv. In Tel Aviv, of course, it’s very gay. Sometimes you think everybody’s gay. It’s very New York-like. I perform everywhere, and I almost never get any trouble or remarks. It’s really changed over the last five years, with Yossi & Jagger [a film by Eytan Fox] and with my coming out, and today it’s totally cool almost everywhere. In a funny way, Israel is a liberal country. It doesn’t look like that sometimes.
What about the riots in Jerusalem?
That’s why I’m saying it’s in a funny way. Because then you go to Jerusalem, and you say, "Let’s do a pride parade in Jerusalem," and somebody can get killed. It’s a different place, Jerusalem. It looks different, it feels different. Because it’s such an important city, not only for Israel or Jews, but Arabs, Christians and a lot of people, and because of that, it makes for a lot of tension, and it’s maybe the biggest religion center in the world. I think that gays and religion are in conflict, maybe, most of the time. Though I have a lot of gay religious friends, but they’re in these very new, open, liberal religions. And in Jerusalem, most of the religious people are very orthodox, and this is why they don’t really like us.
Did you have any difficulty with religion and being gay?
I’m totally not religious. I was born a Jew, my mother is a Holocaust survivor, but I’m totally not religious. So, me, personally, no.
[Lider’s songs in English include "Your Soul" from the film Yossi & Jagger, and a soulful rendition of the Gershwin classic "The Man I Love." Revolutions (Music with a Twist), featuring his song "Jesse," comes out in February 2007.]